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The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast


Nov 3, 2022

Dr. Christine Cocchiola returns to the show to talk about coercive control and its impact on children. Dr. Cocchiola’s goal, and the goal of this episode, is to help you create a more secure environment for your child.  Divorcing an abuser is hard, but while you are going through this really tumultuous time, you can still show your children a path to freedom. Yes, it’s hard work. Perhaps it’s the hardest work you will ever do, but you can reignite the attachment you have always had with your child and be their saving grace too. 

Dr. Christine Marie Cocchiola, DSW, LCSW is a Coercive Control Advocate, Educator, Researcher & Survivor.  She is a full-time college professor teaching social work for the last 20 years in CT and also an adjunct instructor at NYU. Her expertise is in the areas of coercive control and the traumatic experiences of both adult and child victims, developing and presenting workshops on these topics both nationally and internationally.

Show Highlights

  • Coercive control is a pattern of behavior and it can be covert or overt. It is when one person wants to retain power and control over another (4:55)
  • Coercive control is the foundation of most domestic abuse (5:17)
  • If your spouse is abusing you, your child is a victim of abuse too. Children learn how to regulate their behavior to appease an abusive parent. (11:50)
  • You have to be actively working to create a strong foundation so your child clearly knows you are the calm and safe parent (27:21)
  • Abuse is a choice, and there is no excuse for it (41:26)
  • Dr. Cocchiola answers, “Do coercive controllers have the ability to love their children?” (43:44)

Learn more about Christine:

Dr. Christine Marie Cocchiola, DSW, LCSW is a Coercive Control Advocate, Educator, Researcher & Survivor.  She is a full-time college professor teaching social work for the last 20 years in CT and also an adjunct instructor at NYU. Her expertise is in the areas of coercive control and the traumatic experiences of both adult and child victims, developing and presenting workshops on these topics both nationally and internationally.  Christine, a Board Member of the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, has supported policy codifying coercive control and has a small private practice, primarily serving victims and survivors of coercive control.  She is the creator of the Protective Parenting Program, supporting protective mothers on their journey toward healing their children.

Resources & Links:

Information and resources may also be found at: 
https://kateanthony.com/podcast/protective-parenting-with-dr-christine-cocchiola

Dr. Cocchiola’s website
Dr. Cocchiola on Instagram
Dr. Cocchiola on Facebook
Dr. Cocchiola on Twitter
Dr. Cocchiola on LinkedIn
Dr. Cocchiola’s past episode on Coercive Control
The Protective Parenting Program
Surviving the Holidays with Michelle Dempsey-Multack
Co-parenting During the Holidays, During a Pandemic with Michelle Dempsey-Multack


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